Passionate readers

Monday, 17 February 2014

TECHNO: FLAPPY BIRD CAUSE OF DEATH



Flappy bird is dead. You can never get the game in Playstore. I had it and my score is for the passed 2 weeks is 41. What yours? 

There are many reason and coincidence that can be related to the death of Flappy bird but here is our post mortem.

What flappy bird has done wrong?


What had I done wrong? I just make an easy game from Super Mario world game and make it super difficult and super dumb. How is that make me get treated like this? Is it because I am a Vietnam?
What flappy bird has done wrong?

1. The game is too random

Even the color of the bird is randomly pick, the day and night is random and the most hatred green pipe is randomly generated making player has to guest for million route without knowing what difficulties lies ahead. What Flappy Bird could do is at least make the pipe similar through all the level and by doing so at least player can play the game by memorizing not by guessing.

2. Flappy bird wing is not big enough

The anatomy of Flappy bird is impossible to make it flys due to its wing is not big enough to support it own head and body that go inside the head.

3. Flappy bird eyes is too big

Flappy birds, unlike humans but like fish, amphibians and reptiles, have four types of colour receptors in the eye. These give birds the ability to perceive not only the visible range but also the ultraviolet part of the spectrum, and other adaptations allow for the detection of polarised light or magnetic fields. Birds have proportionally more light receptors in the retina than mammals, and more nerve connections between the photoreceptors and the brain. DUH!

4. Flappy bird has no leg make it landing kill itself instancely

If Flappy bird has leg then it will have health bar that work when Flappy bird touch the land the health bar will reduce accordingly with the height of the flight. Then if the health bar is enough Flappy bird can continue fly again. That is if Flappy bird has a pair of LEG!

5. Flappy bird cannot be customize nor upgrade.

The flaw of the Flappy bird games is that it cannot be customize in anyway possible. Gears should put some options for player to upgrade their birdy dicky fapping along their journey so that their fapping bird can venture through the pipe forest of dead easily and without any head landing tragic phenomenon. Some options is that shield, turbo for 5 seconds, rolling flappy bird for 2 second or anything else as long as there is room for customization or upgrade. 
That is for now. There is 5 more coming tommorow. Stay tuned.

KKu et.al
p/s: Fappingbird!!
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